Side chicks have been constant unwanted shadows in relationships and marriages from time immemorial. A side chick can be any woman, from the grandmother in the village to that innocent-looking housemaid in your house. She lurks around relationships and families, knowingly or unknowingly seeking ways to destroy them.
Side chicks are the greatest nightmares for women in committed relationships or marriages. When infidelity breaks a relationship, who is to blame? The side chick.
Smart side chicks deliberately maintain their levels while milking the man with benefits like expensive trips and hot sex. Some men fall in love with their side chicks and promote them to the main chicks, except this time, the promoted madam will be battling other side chicks for their attention.
So who is a side chick? What are signs that a man loves his side chick? What are side chick rules? How can you tell you’re the side chick? What are side chick benefits? Can a man fall in love with his side chick? All these will be discussed in this article.
Side chick meaning
A side chick is a lady who dates a man who is already in another committed relationship. She is the mistress who has to hide like a cockroach when the main chick calls or appears unexpectedly. She is also called a homewrecker or some other derogatory term used to describe her as an immoral woman who uses her feminine wiles to attract and monopolize the attention of a married man or one in a committed relationship.
Another way to describe a side chick is one who seeks out married men to destroy their homes for selfish gains.
Signs he loves his side chick
Most men who have side chicks are not looking forward to any commitment. Rather, side chicks are for easing the stress of work, kids, bills, main chick etc. However, a man can fall in love with his side chick. As a lady, you know your man has a side chick, and you’re wondering if he loves her. Here are ten signs that he loves his side chick:
1. He spends more time with her than with you
When he tells you he has to work late in the night, and you know he has a side chick, know the “late night work” is the side chick. This is a bad sign that he is falling in love with her and wants to be around her as much as possible. For instance, most unfaithful Nigerian men don’t value their side chicks. They just want to knack and go back to their families. But when your man spends more time “outside” than “inside” with you, know that love is in the air, and you’re not involved.
2. He no longer hides his affair
At first, your man is busy sneaking around like a rat, trying everything possible to hide his affair from you. He doesn’t want you to touch his phone or bring out excuses upon excuses why he came back home late. It’s like the more you look, the less you see. Suddenly, he doesn’t care anymore about covering his tracks. He doesn’t deny if you ask him if he has a side chick. And you dare not say a single word against her. He’s in love.
3. He suddenly talks about breaking up, divorcing or marrying a second wife
When he talks about breaking up with you, my dear, side chick alert! If he brings up the subject of divorce or getting a second wife, he’s in love with his side chick. He wants to know your reaction to determine his next steps. Your vehement disapproval doesn’t matter. He has already made up his mind.
4. He’s no longer interested in having sex with you
This is one of the biggest red flags that he has a side chick he has fallen in love with. Their sex life is so amazing that he doesn’t need you to satisfy him anymore.
5. He picks arguments with you all the time
He’s doing this because he is looking for an excuse to get out of the house to be with her. It could also be because he constantly compares you with her in his head. To him, you don’t measure up. Your efforts are nothing compared to what he gets from his side chick. So he picks a fight to ease his guilty conscience and leave the house.
6. He takes better care of his appearance
Like most men, your man doesn’t care about what he puts on and his potbelly. Suddenly, he has registered in a gym and is working out to get six-packs. He changes his wardrobe and looks smashing in his wears. I don’t have to tell you’re not the reason he is making all that effort. Oga wants to look good for his side chick. Why? He is falling in love with her.
He’s chatting all the time on the phone or laptop. When you get closer, he suddenly shuts them down. If you manage to access his devices behind his back and scroll through, you will notice the chats and messages he’s been sending to his “girl.” In addition, you used to know his passwords. You suddenly find out he has changed them without your knowledge. Nne, the side chick is the reason.
8. He’s completely changed
Both of you used to enjoy certain things together. For instance, you guys used to enjoy binging on Netflix, watching football, talking about work, gisting in the kitchen etc. Suddenly, he stops liking those things. Now he prefers watching YouTube videos on celebrity gossip or something like that. You’re wondering who this man is. You don’t understand him again. He likes those things because his side chick likes them, which means he loves her.
9. He’s cold and distant towards you
You feel invisible around him because he’s not paying you any attention. He doesn’t call; he doesn’t text or speak with you. You practically do not exist as far he is concerned. What he’s doing is gradually phasing you out of his life so he could invite his side chick in.
10. He cancels or doesn’t make plans with you anymore
You guys used to make plans together, and he would always be available to see them through. Even if he failed to carry out the plans, there were valid excuses why. But now, he has stopped making any plans. If he does, he will cancel at the last minute, and it’s not once or twice or thrice. It’s all the time. My dear, his side chick has taken over.
ALSO READ: 10 things to know about dating Nigerian men
Side chick rules
Some women enjoy being side chicks. They obey certain unspoken rules to maintain their status. Here are some of the rules:
- Don’t fall in love.
- Know where you stand in the man’s life.
- Keep things quiet. Don’t expose yourself.
- Understand you’re not being courted. Don’t play hard to get.
- Know the risks involved. Your man’s main chick may be the crazy hot-water-pouring type.
- Never stalk your man. Enjoy what he has to offer and leave him alone.
- Do not get caught. An intelligent side chick never gets caught. The whole world will blame you for being a homewrecker and husband snatcher while the man usually gets away with it. Prepare your escape plans when things start getting out of hand.
- Don’t talk when you’re caught. Let the man handle the heat.
- Stay away from the main chick. Don’t sub her on social media or attack her in the mall. She’s not your concern.
- Know your social media status with him. This means no romantic selfies, no PDA, no tagging or mentioning. If possible, don’t follow him on his social media accounts. Be as social media invisible as possible where he is concerned.
- Be ready to give it to him every time. This means if he wants your company, be available. If he wants to have hot sex, be available. If he wants to do kinky stuff with you, aunty, don’t give any excuse. Be available. As a side chick, your ultimate concern should be to make the man happy.
Signs you are the side chick
Men nowadays are very smart when it comes to handling side chicks. You may think you have reached your final bus stop and are preparing to settle down with the love of your life, whom you have probably dated for years. Then you get the shock of your life when you discover that your man is married with kids or getting married to someone else. To avoid premium tears on time, here are signs that you are the side chick:
- He doesn’t show you off to family, friends or social media. If you ask, he claims he’s a private person. Not true. You’re the side chick.
- He’s not always available on Valentine’s Day.
- He doesn’t acknowledge you on social media. He’s always active on social media posting things about himself but never about you. Not even your picture. Babe, you’re the side chick.
- He only picks up your call at certain times, usually during working hours. But at night, when everyone is chilling with their families and loved ones, he’s not available.
- He prefers to hang out with you at his friend’s house. It’s not that he doesn’t have a house. But for some reason, something is happening there that will prevent him from taking you there. My dear, he doesn’t want you to jam his wife or girlfriend.
- He hates surprises. This means he will not appreciate you visiting his office and house unexpectedly.
- He never keeps his promises. He makes plans with you but will cancel or not even remember.
- You can’t attend important events with him.
ALSO READ: How to tell you’re dating mommy’s boy
Side chick benefits
- A side chick has the freedom to do as she likes. There are no serious expectations from her.
- A side chick still has the chance to find the man of her dreams while enjoying the affair.
- She has little or no drama with the man she’s having an affair with.
- No worries about heartbreak. If the affair ends, aunty can walk away without feeling betrayed.
- Hot sex with no string attached.
- She enjoys monetary gifts, expensive trips and items if the man is rich. Even if he’s not, he has to provide for her needs to keep her.
- Who knows, she may eventually end up with the man.
Can a man fall in love with his side chick?
Of course, a man can fall in love with his side chick. If she’s emotionally and sexually present for the man and fulfills all his desires, it is easy for him to fall in love with her. It doesn’t make her better than the main chick. The side chick has a better understanding of the man’s mumu buttons and knows how to utilize them well for her benefit.