I have since hung my ‘boots’, but I still have one or two tricks up my sleeve on how to ask a girl out in Nigeria, whether online (through texts, pictures, or emojis) or offline, and get a ‘yes’.
“Just credit her account and save us the stress of reading this article,” you might say. But before you throw money at the problem, as most Nigerians do, there are more creative ways to do it without doing a Mr Macaroni. And it starts with you!
How to ask a girl out in Nigeria
This journey of a thousand miles begins with a step – Brand You.
Nigerian girls appreciate a good-looking man. And by ‘good-looking’, we don’t mean an RMD face on a CR7 body. Looking good entails grooming, the mother of dress sense, poise, posture, confidence, aura, smell, body language, etc. The way you look is the way she’ll address you. So, first impression, second, and third…until she says yes and afterwards, matter.
Bonus tips on Brand You…
- Gesticulate all the time when talking to her
- Look sideways or at the floor when having a conversation with her
- Slump your shoulders
- Become an overnight stutterer in her presence
- Be on her face like a monitoring spirit
- Maintain eye contact with her
- Smile and look cheerful but not clownish
- Speak calmly with all sincerity
- Give her space
With this under the belt, let’s move to the meat of the matter.
How to ask a girl out in Nigeria
Here we go…
Be mindful of the right place and time
You don’t want to start on a grim note by asking her for a date at the wrong place and time. Knowing when to make a move does not require solving a complex equation. All you need is to study her mood and the environment. Don’t walk up to her when she’s busy ticking her grocery list at ShopRite. Also, please don’t show your captivating chatting skills when she’s with her friends and family. She could be the butt of jokes with you as the subject.
We don’t know the perfect time or place, either. But if you see her often at work, school or church (not during service, though). We reckon both of you will feel comfortable in those settings.
But what if you guys don’t see that often?
No problem. Just be daring and make the move whenever you see her again. Damn the consequences, but be mindful of these:
- Be sure she’s not busy
- Don’t make a move if people are nearby to hear you ask her out
- Study her mood and ‘pounce’ when the signal is inviting
Know what you want
Be clear about your intentions. If you want to ask her out, say it and don’t be bothered if she’ll rebuff you. Remember Matthew 7:7.
Don’t be shy; do it! But by all means, avoid using pick-up lines like these that will elicit a ‘no’:
“Don’t you think we should hang out in the future?”
“It seems there’s a good movie at Silverbird Cinema next week. Let’s see it.”
“The Lagoon restaurant offers delicious chicken and fries. Let’s go tomorrow.”
What you are doing here is making it seem like it will not be a date but asking her to go out with you as a companion. Since you are looking for something more than friendship, quit being vague.
Why not say something along these lines?
“Jane, may I ask you out? There is some excellent wine and seafood at the Lagoon restaurant.”
“Yvonne, if you’re free tomorrow, may I ask you out for lunch? We could go to Silverbird Cinema afterward.”
“Hey, Mimi. Can I ask you out on a date? I reckon you’re a cool babe and I admire you.”
There’s no point hiding your intentions. Let her know from the outset what you want is a romantic date.
List of what else you can do
- Write her a letter
- Invite her to do something you are sure she loves to do
- Be like Wole Soyinka, write a poem about her
- Humour her cos it’s the way to (most) women’s heart
- Send text and emojis (optional)
- Call her
- Use heavy petting when you guys are already friends or acquaintances
- Serenade her
- Invite to cook for her
- Buy her flowers (if you are sure she’ll appreciate it being a Nigerian)
- Or say it with pizza, shawarma, nkwobi, etc
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But above all, be prepared for a ‘no’
Though the article is about how to ask a girl out and get a positive response but Mr. Romeo, rejection is part of dating. You might be well-groomed, smell nice, be articulate, etc., and still get rejected. Chin up and smile. This is not the end of the world.
Don’t let it affect your self-esteem that Jane, Yvonne, and Mimi said ‘no’. You’ll eventually get a yes from Joy or Yolanda or Mabel.
How to ask a girl out online
The chances of being turned down also exist using an online method. The key to success here is to keep her interested in your chats and always longing to see you online. Asking her out online is not about you impressing her with big grammar, or knowing what question to ask or when to ask it. It’s about developing digital chemistry with her, so when you eventually pop the question ‘let us meet’ you get a resounding ‘yes’.
Follow these tips to achieve success and compensate for the data spent on the chase.
Ignore saying ‘hi’ in your initial message to her
You can start with two or three sentences on a topic she will be interested in. Ensure you end with a question that will warrant a response from her.
Don’t make your intentions known until you have established a rapport
Once she finally replies to your message, control the urge to ask her out immediately. Let there be a bond between you and her. You must earn her trust so she can have a reason to meet you and not just because you are interested in her. Getting to know each other better will mean a less awkward date when the time comes.
This will show you are genuinely interested in her. Make the questions as simple as possible. It can be as simple as finding out the story behind her DP.
Look for similar interests
Read her profile to get the information you need. Then, create a conversation around similar interests. The chances that she will she’ll say yes when you ask her out is very high if you practice this.
ALSO READ: How to make a man fall in love with you
Make her laugh
Laughter is the best medicine for developing online chemistry with her. The more you can make her laugh, the better the chance of the relationship moving offline. You don’t have to be a Basket Mouth or Gordons to use humour. However, if you don’t have the basic skill, don’t force it.
Compliment her personality, not her appearance
You haven’t seen her in the flesh, so complimenting her beauty will sound dishonest. Rather, pay glowing tributes to her personality after you must have studied her online activities. If you see that she’s into volunteering, praise her selflessness. Save the physical compliments for your first outing.
After several weeks of chatting and you feel the coast is clear, ask her out. You will get a ‘yes’.
How to ask a girl out through text
You can apply similar methods for online and text. Since we are sure you have mastered the tricks, let us list cute ways to ask a girl out over text.
- I’ve always wanted to try the Chinese restaurant close to Saint Gregory’s College. I checked their menu online, and they have your favourite – fried rice and sesame chicken. What time are you free?
- Good morning, cutie. Are you free for lunch?
- How’s your day going? Would you like to have lunch or dinner?
- I hope you rest well tonight after the heavy traffic on your way home. Would you like to meet for breakfast in the morning?
- I’m so proud of your achievement. Let’s go out and celebrate, Can’t wait to see you!
- I enjoy texting and talking with you, would like to take you out for a change.
- I have an extra ticket for the movie, Squid Game, showing at Terra Kulture. What time should I pick you up?
- I have this event coming up on Saturday. I would like you to accompany me.
- My family and friends are getting together this weekend. I’d love it if you’d be my guest.
After reading this article and you are still not sure how to approach that girl because you’re afraid of rejection, I won’t say you should strengthen your communication skills. I will say you should fix a date with… a professional therapist who will help with overcoming anxiety or communication challenges.
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