Relationship

Forgiveness matters: 11 easy ways to let go of grudges before 2025

Forgiveness matters: 11 easy ways to let go of grudges before 2025

It is a few weeks from 2025, and this is the best time to reflect and think of what you will take with you into the New Year or what you will drop this year. Letting go of grudges should be on the top of the list of things to drop this year if you are looking forward to a fresh start next year.

Now, keeping grudges is normal human nature. That cheating partner, abusive parent, the best friend that betrayed you, the list goes on and on. The thing is we have all kept grudges at some points in our lives, for legitimate reasons. However, this is a time to start learning to let go.

Yes, it is not going to be easy to let go of something that has probably become a part of your life after a long time. But you will experience a sense of relief and peace when you unburden yourself of those grudges. Therefore, here are 11 easy ways to let go of grudges before 2025.

11 easy ways to let go of grudges before 2025

1. Acknowledge that you are hurt

Acknowledge that you are hurt

Some people who feel wronged will let themselves believe they have forgiven and forgotten whereas the opposite is the case. It takes only a little thing to trigger them and you will realise that forgiveness is far from them. If you want to stop carrying around any grudges, you need to first acknowledge that it exists. Tell yourself you have been hurt. You can also vent t0 an external source like writing the grudge down in a journal or expressing your feelings to a good listener. The relief you will feel after letting everything out is priceless.

2. Think of how this grudge has affected you

Child abuse: Meaning, types, signs and prevention
Photo credit: Istockphotos

Whether you like it or not, carrying a grudge against someone or people will affect you in one way or the other. Do you have trust issues? Think back on a loved one who betrayed your trust. You do not want kids? Maybe your harsh upbringing has made being a parent a scary idea for you.

You see, keeping a grudge, especially for a long time can have a ripple effect on many aspects of your life. Think about it and you will conclude that you need to let go if you want to enjoy 2025 in peace.

3. Put yourself in the other person’s shoe

Put yourself in the other person's shoe

Empathy is a crucial factor in the art of forgiveness. If there is no empathy, it will be difficult to forgive. The same applies to letting go of a grudge against someone who offended you. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Can it be that your partner cheated on you because you were abusive towards him or her? Maybe your abusive parent was that way because of their own personal trauma or maybe your best friend betrayed you because they needed the money offered for the betrayal?

Ask yourself if you would do what they did if you had the same experience? If the answer is yes, then that will put you in a better mind to forgive. If not, it is a great opportunity to understand the person that offended you.

4. Think of what you will gain if you decide to let go

Think of what you will gain if you decide to let go
Photo credit: iStockphotos

There are many benefits of letting go of a grudge. First, you will have peace of mind. Secondly, you will have the opportunity to repair broken relationships. Third, you will build a stronger support system, and so much more. Instead of wasting energy keeping grudge that the other person may not even be aware of, it is best to channel it to more positive things.

5. Realise that people think and act differently

Realise that people think and act differently

What looks like a betrayal to you may look normal to the other person. Your parents used to flog you when you were little may seem like an abuse to you. To them, it is a normal part of parenting. After all, the Holy Bible says, “spare the rod and spoil the child.” When you realise that people act the way they do, not because of any inherent evil, but because of who they are, you will learn to let things go.

6. Stop the blame game

Stop the blame game
Photo credit: iStock photos

Some people derive satisfaction from heaping all their personal problems on other people. You will often hear things like, “if not for what you did to me that year, I would have been a millionaire today.” If you are this person, let that blame game end this year. Take responsibilities for your contribution to the problems and let go.

7. Turn to your support system

Turn to your support system
Photo credit: Dreamstime

You do not have to carry the burden of keeping a grudge alone. If it is too much, then talk to your support system which can be your family, friend, therapist and even online communities. But remember that those listening to you vent are humans and are bound to get tired of your ranting. So, learn to listen to them when they tell you to let go and actually tell you how to do it.

8. Talk to the person who offended you, if possible

Talk to the person who offended you, if possible

Sometimes, someone may offend you unknowingly and wonder why you changed your attitude towards them. Talk issues out with the person that offended you. Tell them what they did that upset you. Maybe they will acknowledge their offense and try to make up for it.

9. Forgive

Forgive

Accept the offender’s apology and forgive. If they do not apologise, forgive anyway. Forgiveness is about finding peace and it is only you that will give yourself that.

10. Do not dwell on what happened

How to Let Go

When you forgive, try to forget. Resist the temptation of dwelling on what happened. If it comes, try to distract yourself with something else. When you forgive and forget completely, you release all the toxic emotions inside you into the wind. However, those emotions will come rushing back if you entertain any lingering thoughts of what happened. For your peace of mind, do not bear any grudge in mind again.

11. Do not put expectations on people

People outside the Abbey following the procession |skabash.com
Photo Credit: BBC Pidgin

You may be setting yourself up for disappointment if you make expectations of people. Remember they are humans, meaning they are not perfect. Instead focus on things that make you happy and fulfilled. When you do not make expectations, you may be less likely to be disappointed, and less likely to carry a grudge.

ALSO READ: Here are 13 ways to improve your self-worth before 2025

Previous ArticleNext Article
Nonye is a Thespian, screenwriter, creative writer and an unapologetic lover of books, great movies and sports. She has over 10 years experience in content writing on entertainment, movies, sports and lifestyle. Nonye is currently a content writer at Blackdot Media and founder of litafrik.com
Send this to a friend